A Fairy Tale?

Once upon a time there was a young couple. They fell in love got married, bought a house in the suburbs, had 2 children and a dog. For the next 21 years they lived just like everyone else. The young couple worked hard to provide their children with what they thought was important, nice clothes and toys, dance and gym classes, and family vacations. They were a happy family. As their children got older their needs changed, now they were going to university, but the parents believed that if they continued to work hard, their children just like everyone else's would be happy and successful. Then one day everything changed, their oldest daughter got Cancer. Instead of working hard to provide their children with stuff, they were working hard to provide their children with emotional support. Instead of paying for education, now they were paying for the drugs required to keep their daughter alive. Instead of having quality time from outings and family vacations now they were attempting to have quality time in a hospital room. Instead of discussing their daughters future with her educators now they were discussing her survival with her doctors. There were bad days and good days. The family celebrated not just good grades or getting a new job but positive outcomes from biopsy's and staying in remission. A subtle shift started to occur, the hardworking parents began to see that what was really important was being together, watching a movie, sharing a pizza and enjoying each others company. Things went along in this way for several years and then one day everything changed again, the cancer had returned. Medical therapy was given but, didn't work. Travel to another country always a dream of the daughters became a reality, not for pleasure but for experimental treatment to try to save her life. However, despite the mightiest efforts of the parents, doctors and community the daughter was not to be saved. So, instead of planning showers and weddings like everyone else, the parents planned a funeral.

Today, lessons learned are becoming clear. We have experienced great sorrow, met incredible people and learned that the true power of love is the ability to give without wanting or needing to receive. We have learned that we are not like everyone else, we can't be and no longer wish to be, we are unique. This desperately sad experience changed all of us, it woke us up to the fragility of life. The parents are still hard working, still want their daughter to be happy and successful but, now they count their riches not in material gains and 'stuff' but in the relationships they have garnered from the beautiful people who have come into their lives offering love, comfort and friendship.

Ever resilient, always searching for either a reason for the loss of my daughter or a lesson, I believe I have found one, although it is a hard way to learn such a lesson.